Labor Pains
My intentions were good. I wanted to stop in and wish everyone a happy Labor Day weekend. But that reminded me that, as a boy, I thought Labor Day was a time meant to honor the physical act of childbirth. I was a simple child, you know. Dumb as a tree stump. And I haven’t got any smarter since.
But the point is, I came here to express a simple holiday greeting and got to thinking about the disgusting physics of birthing, instead. And whenever I think of that, I’m reminded of the classic scene from “The Fly” when Geena Davis pushes from her loins a healthy, plump maggot borne of the insect she’s been banging.
It’s a great moment in cinema. When I saw the movie in the theater, some wit stood up during that scene and started singing: “Having my maggot… what a beautiful way to say that you love me, baby.”
I wish I’d thought of that.
It’s very hard being me, you know. Half the stories I write feature dead things and so I’ve had to become intimately familiar with the maggot. I’ve studied them. I’ve dated them. Such a reviled creature, the maggot has long been used as a literary mechanism to symbolize rot or teeming horror.
I’m not one to break a trend. Here are a couple of my favorite maggots in their natural habitat. One is a video, one a story with very pleasing photos. Each is a great deal more interesting, and less disgusting, than actual childbirth.
I mean, gross!
September 2nd, 2007 at 6:46 pm
Maggots have also given us good things too, flamer. Since the 1800′s they have been used by forensic pathologists to determine time of death. Certain types of flies lay eggs minutes after death and through tracking the growth levels of the maggots, an almost infallible time of death can be ascertained.
September 2nd, 2007 at 7:06 pm
Ah, maggots. It’s nice to know that they’re good for something besides making me want to vomit. Thanks for the science lesson, Gil.
September 3rd, 2007 at 1:30 am
YOU THINK IT’S HARD BEING YOU, MATE? Well what about US?? At least you’re there while the disgusting ideas coalesce, you have a chance to sort of get used to them. WE have them sprung on all full-blown … damn, now I’M starting to use maggot-speak!
September 3rd, 2007 at 2:08 pm
How about the guy found dead in his bathtub. Investigators scooped maggots out of the brackish water, dropped them into a blender and made a nice, maggot shake to test forensically. Makes you want to run to the Dairy Treat, doesn’t it?
September 3rd, 2007 at 5:19 pm
Maggots in the news
Safe for work
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/crime/article2310422.ece
http://blogs.jsonline.com/pets/archive/2007/08/31/one-fight-lost.aspx
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSL1669040220070816
http://www.mlive.com/news/bctimes/index.ssf?/base/news-10/1188227739124770.xml&coll=4
September 3rd, 2007 at 7:03 pm
Dairy Queen..maybe. Dairy Treat, never heard of it.
My favorite Labor Day story happened when I was pregnant with my son Taylor (BIG SNIFF!! EIGHTEEN years ago!). We went to a party at our friends camp. Somebody had a cake made, showed it to me and said, ” I had this cake made especially for you!” Of course it read “Happy Labor Day!” Priceless.