Well, waddaya know. A man who turned himself blue. I do hope he’ll parlay his azure tone into some really kicking pickup lines or at least a stand up comedy routine.

“You’ll have to forgive me if I seem a little sluggish. I just blue into town…”

*crickets chirping*

“Wow, what a great crowd. How you all doing? It’s great to be here. So… Any Smurf fans in the audience tonight? This is what happens when you sleep with that bitch Smurfette.”

*mild laughter*

“Wow, okay. I see this is going to be tough. Everyone’s cranky around the holidays, I guess. Know what my favorite holiday song is? Anybody? Want take a stab at it?”

*nervous tittters.*

“I’ll h-have a-uh bluuuuuue… bluuuue Christmas without you…”

*earnest laughter*

“Thank you. That’s more like it. It’s a great song, isn’t it? Although, I’m more of a blues fan, myself.”

*rim shot*

“Yeah, it ain’t easy being me. I haven’t gotten laid in years. You know what happens to the male anatomy when you don’t get laid? That’s right. Blue balls.

*double rim shot*

I think it’s safe to say the man with the bruise-toned skin will have much better material than that. You’ll dye laughing.

I got nothing.

A man with blue skin has moved to California hoping to find good neighbors. Paul Karason’s skin has gradually turned blue over the last 14 years. He says he moved from Oregon to Madera hoping to find people who are more accepting of his condition. Karason’s skin turned blue after years of drinking a substance call colloidal silver. He extracts silver from metal then puts it in water using an electrical current. Karason says he drinks the chemical to cure “anything that ails him.” >> more

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